- The secret to success is knowing who to blame for your failures.
- I don’t have an attitude problem. You have a perception problem.
- If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy
- If practice makes perfect, and nobody’s perfect, why practice?
- It was an accident officer. I was cleaning my fingernails. With a hunting knife. And he ran into me. Backwards. 17 times!
- Do not disturb. Already disturbed.
- When a man talks dirty to a woman, it’s sexual harassment. When a woman talks dirty to a man, it’s $3.95 per minute.
- Do you ever notice that when you’re driving, anyone going slower than you is an idiot and everyone driving faster than you is a maniac?
- The probability of someone watching you is proportional to the stupidity of your action.
- It’s no accident that ‘stressed’ spelled backwards is ‘desserts’.
- I said no to drugs, but they did not listen!
- The IDEAL man does not smoke, does not drink, does not flirt, goes to bed early, in short… does not exist.
- Life would be a lot easier if I had the source-code.
- If I can be of any help, you’re in worse trouble than I thought.
Thanks again! I love quotes too… You can expect a post with good quotes every week… If you have a collection of your own, forward them to me and we’ll share with everyone else… 🙂
Cool quotes dude…thahst why ur blog is my favourite